seriously

I went to bed at 3 under the impression that hmm i can catch some good ZZZZZZZS!!! NO I DIDNT WHY? Because my grandfather must have invited someone over and my grandfather couldn't even hear the door bell ring...which is REALLY annoying and frustrating because this man rang the door bell like god knows how many time. I was so pissed I open the door with my eyes squinting from the light..didn't even SAY anything... he asked if my grandfather was home ...i was half asleep so i'm not even sure if I answered because I was half asleep. AND NOW IM SITTING HERE FEELING GUILTY FOR BEING RUDE...GAH fuck that shit I have lost SLEEP due to my old man refusing to get hearing aids due to his masculinity and pride. and NO I can't go back to sleep. I have not been getting the proper sleep for the past few days and I swear NO ONE BETTER get in my way when I sleep in.

BAZINGA

So I'm loving the Big Bang theory.. I'm almost done catching up with season three. So in this particular episode Sheldon was having great difficulty solving an equation, which resulted in him getting no sleep for three days and basically going insane. Sheldon is my favorite character! This is one of the scenes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSqestqf63k

lalalal

So I'm sitting here on my bum working on my review questions for my exam on friday. Tomorow I'm going to meet with my friends and reviewwwwwwwwww! This course seems easy and it's as if you can BS your way out of it. Seriously you can if your answers are "care" and "client" centered than you can get away with it. BUT NO the profs are aware of that and for that they make the questions difficult OR the mark hard OR BOTH. And the marks goes for the SPECIFICS.

awww well Jojo has a new set up. I REALLY wanted this basking cabin for Jojo's tank because he was outgrowing all his rocks. For my birthday my brother had got me the basking cabin. I just put the set up together today after cleaning his tank. He was so excited just to have much more place to swimm. He went up into cabin twice. It takes a while to adjust. Right now he looks SO CUTE he's sleeping. Anyways bacccccccck to work

flush

I want to sleep..but can't ..MUST STUDY for ANATOMY and PHYSIOLOGY. this stuff is just dragging on..it's like getting waxed but slowly peeling that hot waxed strip of cloth off.
I understand people are trying to be all "bacteria control" and hygenic but I HATE those damn automatic toilets. Whenever I go to use them at school I always sit with reluctance and this anxiety that it will flush by itself while I'm peeing and then it might spray on my va-jayjay. UrghHH!!! even the thought of that is making me squirm. And I can't squat my thighs don't have the power. once i tried that and I collapsed onto the toilet. Besides there's this fulfillment and sensation when you sit (not squat) on a toilet and let it all release. yah I'm messed. I want SLEEP!

sounds fun

Disclaimer: there may be typos or spelling mistakes I'm too lazy to go over this entry and correct it. Apologies in advance BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
say it ..GRAN-u-losa..tehehhe
you know what I don't get why is testes pronounced testees and not tes-tes with no emphasis on the E on the second round of tes in testes. I have this dull pain in my head... I think it's because of my bun. You know what's cool though I can locate the lobes of the brain...THATS A BIG FUCKIN ACCOMPLISHIMENT..I probably didn't do it right but I think I did. I've been inside the house for most of the day. I dont understand who is outside smoking at this friken hour the smell is drifting into my room. Ohhh my cilia is going to be destroyeeeeeeedd!!!!
I'm trying to understand female hormones.. which believe me is more confusing than I thought!
I've been watching too much TBBT that I wish the characters were real and my friends. bahahah i'm joking...(maybe 20% true) please Im sure other have done it.
Here's an update on my life:
-I feel fat..I am fat..i've gained weight and well it's not doing well on how I percieve my body image. But I'm going to do something about it but right now is not the best time to launch a goal of fitness. Especially when I plan on station my ass to study this weekend.
-Jojo has outgrown is damn rock..I need to get rid of it because it's also has algea growing on it. Im not getting him a new basking rock. Im probably going to go out and get him this lil cabin thing that attaches to the tank so he can go and bask. Or maybe I'll make it myself since I have NOTHING better to do. So while I was studying jojo was on his filthy rock and he was staring at me...and I was staring at him..went on for about a minute. Then he got bored and looked somewhere else. =\ I guess he's uncomfortable with long akward stares or he was bored. I can't stand akward silences. I need to learn how to not be bugged by it. =\
- I'm almost done TBBT yeah I'm in season 3! See I'm not sitting here watching episodes and epsiodes of it. I reward myself. Once I finish something I watch it... when I'm eating I watch it.
-these exams are driving me FUCKING CRAZY!
-I smell funky...tehehehe

People

It was just one of those days. Those crappy..sluggish..moody..days. Of course the weather didn't suit it. It was one of those days where you really didn't want to interact with anyone and just by yourself. But then you realize what amazing (but very few) people there are out there that will just make you smile and crack you up. I'm exhausted and I don't know why. I'm really not feeling really good about myself either.

UGH

So my mom gave me birthday money to buy clothes (she specified clothes when she gave me the money) I didnt like the thought of shopping and now im just frustrated...feeling insecure..like shit... and like I wasted money. I bought this nice top though (even though my mom wasn't so AHH it's so nice about it) and this dress from american eagle on clearence. and this is where the problem arose when I bought it looked nice and it is a nice dress but me and that dress don't have that connection. I dont even know why I got the dress I'm not even a dress person (even though it's like the best thing to wear when it's fucking 30 degrees out and I just want to melt and die) anyways shit i cant even concentrate my mom is singing along with some tamil singing show (tamil version of american idol) which the girl seems to be singing in a high pitch that I SWEAR ITS GONNA SHATTER MY FRIKKEN EAR BUDS! okay yes I am in a VERY bitchy Anyways where was I? Oh yeah so the dress was meh and I guess it will come in use somehow. I just feel like I have too much clothes. I just want to throw some of it out. I feel so spoiled and shitty and BAH. i know omg I feel crappy for having too much clothes when there is people out there who have no frikken clothes! Anyways once i'm done school I'm going to get out everything I frikken own and sort it into piles and get rid of clothes that aren't purposeful and DONATE THEM. AS for the dress..it was on clearence so IT can't be refunded. Anyways aside from the two tops I think the most purposeful purchase I made today was the shoes. These shoes were my long lost love. What had happen was I had these shoes that I bought from walmart for $10 they were selling the SAME style at ALDO for $50!! I felt so good about myself for having these shoes and they felt AMAZING just wearing them because they went with everything. Then I lost one shoe bc I kept the shoes in my car and I DONT KNOW it just went missing. I was so SAD.And now I have been reuinted I WILL NEVER LOOSE YOU AGAIN.

Anyways I do apologize for this uhm shallow materialistic superficial pointless blog I just feel crappy like I wasted time, money and just BAHHNESS. I HATE SHOPPING. It requires alot of mental strengh and ability. because sometimes things don't look good on you and you get frustrated and you wish that you can starve yourself and fuckin become skinny. And ability is to hunt down the perfect outfit and not look like some fobbed out loser. Seriously some floral clothing does not look good on a frizzy haired brown chick. ANYWAYS I am going to go watch an episode of big bang theory and then study.. i need my fix of big bang theory (despite i've watched like 3-4 episodes today).

I did it

Not a big accomplishment...but I unsuscribed all the newletters and flyers I get online from all stores. It's annoying because I don't look at them and I rather avoid something I might like.

WTF

Just watched the new video for Rihanna's song "Rude Boy"...WHAT THE FUCK?!
It reminded me of an MIA video which clearly the purpose for her videos is to watch it when your high but this ..this ..this is just =| WHAT THE FUCK?!
I guess it's wrong of me to assume this that a women should perserve her sense of sexuality especially after the crap she's been through with chris brown... but she just seemed like those cheap video vixens to me. I just lost that little respect I had for her for being so strong after being through the abuse.

psychotic psychic

So remember my dream about ciliated pseudostratified columnar epithelium ...yah..that was a question on my test. =| I told my friends about my dream...one says WHY the hell are you dreaming that..dream about the lottery numbers and we all don't have to be here. Oh man I wish. I don't know I think even If I win the lottery I'd still finish my studies. I'd probably want to do nursing for several years and then teach it (if I win the lottery). But at the same time one can't make conclusions when they aren't in the situation. What I mean is who knows? Maybe I get lazy and just don't go to work? Which, I hope I never do. I been through hell and back (yeah sort of dramatic) to get myself into nursing.

Anyways, prior to me finding this out I told a few of my friends and my bf. I had this deep gut feeling my anatomy and physio. exam will be on my birthday. Well just my luck. It's not a bad thing seeing that I knew I had my exams that week. I have two week to prepare and I feel like it's not enough. I need to start writing down days to just review my lecture notes and than a few days before that I can just STUDY LIKE THERE'S no tomorow. I guess I'm nervous... I don't want to mess this up. This is my favorite song (besides Right Here Right Now by fatboy slim) This was like my motivation "you'll get through this shit" song when things weren't just going right. Around this time last year:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIE5QtkxzvM

My test yesterday was BRUTAL. Like for the past 4 tests, never have I bullshitted on the short answer part. Like I knew my stuff 100% (I'm not gloating.. It's just I was comfortable with it). For this test..ARGH omg I just wrote down whatever I could think of to get some marks. Now I have to work on a paper due today for PPG. I'm done most of it but I want to perfect it because this teacher is a hard marker. So I'm literally relying on the outline, the multiple marking schemes to write this damn paper so she has nothing to say.. but I'm sure she would have something to say because I am human and I will most likely make mistakes. Anyways Glee is on tonight so I'm looking forward to that. I also need to work on my paper due for psych tomorow.

Harper has intiated a nuclear saftey plan.. it's weird but interesting. What I don't get is why are they returning the stockpile to US? Apparently it will be converted to an unusuable nuclear weapon..uhm so what kind of weapon? I get that Canada and US are strong alliances...but do we not have the resources and technology to do it ourselves? I guess I'm failing to understand alot of these transactions happens daily between the US and Canada.

cynical

not feeling so good about myself. it's come to the point where im like screw it let me just write this damn test and get it over with. Then I realized pushing that outta the door opens the many other doors for my ppg assignment, my psych assignment and my psych test which I have NOT done the readings for. lovely.

Cilia

Imagine waking up from a dream about this:

Ciliated pseudostratified columnar epithelium

Yeah no joke. It's weird... I usually have a tendency of dreaming about things I study. I noticed if I stress about the subject a little bit more than usual then the more prominent the dreams are. So yesterday when I had my nap I was dreaming about coagulation( blood clotting). It's really weird but I guess it's my brain's way of memorizing and putting things into my long term memory. But this one my god has to be the WEIRDEST. I think the coolest feature about this is the cilia. This is basically found in the trachea ....so the cilia is there to push out any dirt or dust that's iritating it. It's the cilia that's responsible for pushing it up to your throat so you can either spit it our or swallow it. When people smoke these cilia usually die..and they don't grow back. Anyways for those who are still reading...when my turtle jumps into the water it sounds like poop plopping..weird but true..he startles me time to time..especially at night when im frikken sleeping! But yeah i remember when I was in high school I'd have dreams about doing math equations. Once i had a dream about chemistry and I woke up and got out of bed to see if my dream was even right.

Resistance

This is exactly why I avoid the mall as much as I can. I had to go pay a phone bill and so me and my bf decided to look around the mall. I fell in love with this jacket and sweater thingie (seriously I dont know how to describe it) but yeah..now I can't stop thinking bout how slimmed down I looked in the damn jacket. I mean if I want I can go get it BUT I'm trying to save and I am not breaking this good habit because of some EVIL TEMPTATION! I keep telling myself I have a jacket...I have a jacket..although I don't have a sweater thingie like that. But it's far too overpriced frikken $30 and theres no sleeves! ...but it's so nice. Okay im going to shut up..stop being so overdramatic and materialistic. Well I got to say though I feel better about myself, I finally feel back on my feet ..financially. I think the problem was I was relying too much on eating out and splurging on clothes when they weren't necessary.
Anyways I have one more chapter to read and do questions for...my goal today was to read two chapters. Tomorow I will have to read one and the rest of the weekend I have to study like there's NO FRIKKEN TOMOROW. Test #5 for anatomy is the most brutal.. more BRUTAL THAN A PMSING CANNIBAL. Mainly because there are three chapters (opposed to 2 chapters we had for prior tests except test 1) and ALSO because it's on blood (self study), Respiratory system and Cardiovascular system. I did the respiratory system today.. it's straightforward but I think I need to revise thoroughly for clarification. It's funny though when I was doing my reading I'd notice my breathing and when I pay attention to it I'd like hold my breath...I don't even know WHY. I'm weird. After this upcoming test it will be I believe three more chapters and then the final EXAM! After Test #5 I am going to review like a review-ophile. I got most of my assignments out of the way that's due next week.. it's just I have to go over them add some stuff and make it look nice (content wise). Wow I sound like a loser only talking about school.. this month is just crazy.
So apparently in calagary there have been news reports of metal objects in food? uhmm...is that not creepy. in the same article it goes on to say how a push pin was found in an apple at a food bank!! We already have to worry about the accumulation of growth hormones, antibiotics, pesticides, perservatives and all that other lovely chemicals in our food..now we have to worry about pieces of metal. =| So ugh.. how about kate gosselin on that dancing with the stars show...at first I try to be open-minded about her and that she wasnt an attention seeking shishkabob but really...she needs to get out of trying to be in the limelight. But who am I to judge?

Random #2

So I walked into my parents room (secretly praying they weren't having sex..yeah i know its weird but i never EVER want to be in that situation) when they were sleeping. I wanted to tell my mom I had packed the leftovers for my lunch. I woke my mom up..she was awake.. her eyes were open..well i guess i was wrong. she stared at me and goes "hi..who are you?" seriously this would freak someone out at 11:oo pm ..my mom eyes were wide open and she was asking me this in a creepy childish voice. Im like "amma! stop jokin!" then she goes "who is he?" *pointing to my dad* then i just stood there for my mom to wake up .. she woke up after a few seconds and she's asks me what? and I told her bout the food. then my dad turns around and says hi... I said hi back. I told him you know she was talking in her sleep? then my dad goes in english Oh yeah I wonder what episodes shes in. This creeped me out more... i hope to god my dad wasn't half asleep as well and was talking bout some porn episode. and i hope to god my parents weren't just screwing with me bc seriously..they need must be really bored. AND I wonder if my parents were high of some hallucinogen ...but yeah half asleep ppl creep me out.

uhm yeah random

So my bf and I are driving home..well I'm driving. It's dark, foggy and I guess I'm a bit more on the edge and cautious about my driving. With my heightened senses my bf decides to yell "OMG BABY!!!" I'm like WHAT?!?!?!? (thinking I'm going to hit something) He replies with double the excitement: "THEY ARE OPENING UP A PIZZA NOVA AT THIS PLAZA!!" Followed by an excited AND HIGH PITCH SCREAM. Now I didn't know he loved pizza nova THAT much. But yeah his high pitch scream caught me off guard I just burst out in laughter. The last time I heard him scream like that was when I went to wonderland with him. I decided to stop screaming and I hear this some high pitch screaming.. but why can I hear it so closely? I lean over the protective seat to look at my bf.. I see him screaming mouth open eyes closed..and yes with his high pitch scream. ahh gotta love him :P

the other day me and my friend were on the phone. I was making fun of the car volvo because it sounds like vulva ( I know im so mature) anyways I knew vulva was a part of the girl special place but I couldn't WHAT exactly.. to my unfortunate luck I googled vulva clicked on wikipedia. this is how it went:
A: I wonder how it looks... OMG HOLY FUCK!
H: what??! WHAT? *googles it* Should I look??
A: OMG WHY DOES IT LOOK LIKE THAT ?! Is that NORMAL? I can't stop looking at it!!
H: should I look?!
A: yes go look!!
H: OMG WTF!! *screams, curses and yells in repulse*
A & H: both laugh it off
H: you know antonio banderas is kinda hott...

Lol i don't know how she got from a vulva to antonio banderas but uhmm okay. If you'd like the full affect of our conversation go to wikipedia and search uhm vulva. It ain't pretty ..this is what I mean when I say the girls anatomy down there ain't pretty!

Looks like stewie felt the same way:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TudKBbaOAfs

Music Therapy

I look up to the sky
And now the World is mine
Ive known it all my life
I made it, I made it!
I used to dream about, the life I'm living now
I know that theres no doubt.
I made it, I made it!

developmental psych.

Quote from Parenthood.

[Gil has been complaining about his complicated life; Grandma wanders into the room]
Grandma: You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster.
Gil: Oh?
Grandma: Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride!
Gil: What a great story.
Grandma: I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn't like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.

This was my favorite part because it spoke so loudly to me..and it wasn't because the volume was too high. :P

...

I am going insane.

Mojoooo Jooojoooo

Well obviously it was gorgeous weather so jojo was taken out to get some fresh air and rays! he loved the weather..last year he wasn't to fond of walking in the grass but this year he loved it.

photos from today =]

and these are from today with the bf.

photos from a while back with the best friend

Here are some photos I took a while back on a day out with the best friend.

im blue dabadidabadaa

I had work today so I demo-ed blue cheese and harvati. im exhausted tomorow is going to be beautiful weather so maybe jojo can go for a walk outside.. im sure he'd love it. although i know he doesnt like the heat that much. he usually goes and hides under the car. honestly I can't stop yawning. it was so busy at work. and i dont know why people would just stand there and stare at me slice cheese. shouldn't they be shopping?
so the next three weeks of april is going to be hectic. My plan is two be a step or two ahead just to manage it. Let's hope I stick to it before I drown in my work. I'm listening to old school tamil songs? man those were some good songs.
the other night I was frustrated with my hair. see my bangs got too long that they don't look like bangs..so i got scissors and cut them. it's short.. but NOT too short. i honestly didn't want to go give a hairstylist $5 to frikken cut my bangs. so i just did it myself. =\ ye im gonna be the mother who puts a bowl on her child's head and cuts around it. bahahahhahahahaaaaa
i've been wanting to get a dress..simple one and rock the whole black panty hose and flat thing. yes that's right a dress. but then i saw this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XP7bSQpcWVY

thank you from preventing my mind from wandering. im trying to save moola but my wants seem to be tempting.